I don’t know what to say… This was supposed to be satirical but instead it’s jaded bah-humbug. But, here we go the 12 days of Christmas: coal version. It’s important to remember that a lot of nasty surprises still occur over Christmas, like any other time of year.
12 lumps of coal.
On the first day of Christmas,
Santa give to me
A list of medical fees.
On the second day of Christmas
Santa gave to me
Two broken legs,
And a list of medical fees.
On third day of Christmas,
Santa gave to me
Three fractures,
Two broken legs,
And a list of medical fees.
On the fourth day of Christmas
Santa gave to me
Four weeping wives,
Three fractures,
Two broken legs,
And a list of medical fees.
On the fifth day of Christmas
Santa gave to me
Five bloody noses,
Four weeping wives,
Three fractures,
Two broken legs,
And a list of medical fees.
On the sixth day of Christmas
Santa gave to me
Six people fighting,
Five bloody noses,
Four weeping wives,
Three fractures,
Two broken legs,
And a list of medical fees.
On the seventh day of Christmas
Santa gave to me
Seven children a sneaking,
Six people fighting,
Five bloody noses,
Four weeping wives,
Three fractures,
Two broken legs,
And a list of medical fees.
On the eighth day of Christmas
Santa gave to me
Eight cars a crashing,
Seven children a sneaking,
Six people fighting,
Five bloody noses,
Four weeping wives,
Three fractures,
Two broken legs,
And a list of medical fees.
On the nineth day of Christmas
Santa gave to me
Nine laced drinks,
Eight cars crashing,
Seven children sneaking,
Six people fighting,
Five bloody noses,
Four weeping wives,
Three fractures,
Two broken legs,
And a list of medical fees.
On the tenth day of Christmas
Santa gave to me
Ten cracked ribs,
Nine laced drinks,
Eight cars crashing,
Seven children sneaking,
Six people fighting,
Five bloody noses,
Four weeping wives,
Three fractures,
Two broken legs,
And a list of medical fees.
On the twelfth day of Christmas
Santa gave to me
Twelve lumps of coal,
Eleven missing teeth,
Ten cracked ribs,
Nine laced drinks,
Eight cars crashing,
Seven children sneaking,
Six people fighting,
Five bloody noses,
Four weeping wives,
Three fractures,
Two broken legs,
And a list of medical fees.
Next stop: The End. 
Comments on: "12 lumps of coal" (9)
Bahamas humbug indeed! Well done 😉
Bahamas humbug? That sounds fun!
oh… well how did I miss that? Bah humbug it’s supposed to be!! 😉
Sounds like a good Christmas; better than a wedding party. Bravo.
Hopefully the new year will be much better. 😀
Haha well, I’m down a brain tumor and a boyfriend. It’s only up from here 😀
Sounds like good riddance to both of them! Hahaha! 😀
That is truth. And it takes passionate emotions tempered with strength to write; can’t say that anyone who’s faced a trial or two is lacking in that respect.
Very true!